Cultivating Self-Love
Using Mindfulness to Surface Truth
(With a FREE Printable Workbook)
Doesn’t your heart just melt when you hold a baby in your arms? Their soft precious bodies, doe-eyes and active presence in that moment makes them … simply perfect. They were made from love and all babies are worthy of our love.
You were once that beautiful, perfect child. And you are still that beautiful, perfect child. It doesn’t matter what you look like, how often you think you’ve failed or done ‘wrong’, you will always be a beautiful, perfect human worthy of love.
Self-love is not a destination though, it’s a practice that we are all so capable of cultivating more of in our lives. If that seems hard or even out of reach at the moment, I invite you to think of love as an action, rather than a feeling. That way, you are accountable for putting it into practice, as only you are responsible for your own self-love and worthiness.
Social Scientist and queen of self-love, Dr. Brené Brown says that if you want to fully experience love and belonging, you must believe that you are worthy of love and belonging. When you let go of what people think and own your story, you gain access to your worthiness - the feeling that you are enough just as you are. Worthiness doesn’t have prerequisites. You are worthy of love and belonging now, just as you are.
Practising self-love means learning how to trust yourself, to treat yourself with respect and be kind and affectionate towards yourself. It’s coming back into your body and reconnecting with your inner child and believing in their worth.
Mindfulness can help you tap into your inner child by first observing your own internal dialogue. Would you say those things to a beautiful, perfect child? The way that you talk to yourself dictates how you feel towards yourself - your self-love. When you are mindful of the voice inside your head, or the egoic mind as Eckhart Tolle calls it, you can start to distinguish between your true self and your thoughts. Two completely separate ‘selves’ - one of love, worthiness and belonging and the other aspect of the mind that is not useful but pretends to be useful. This voice is often unkind, self-critical and stems from a place of fear, rather than love.
The funny thing though is that we can see the truth about the egoic mind and still be enticed by it. We can still believe it when it says things like ‘you’re not smart enough, pretty enough, good enough’, etc., so we need to practise coming back to ourselves as much as possible. Ground yourself in the present moment and breathe into your body. Notice the thoughts passing by like watching clouds drifting across the sky. They’ll always be there, especially on those miserable and rainy days. But rain doesn’t have to dampen your spirit, it’s just the weather after all.
Action Self-Love
Download the Self-Love Workbook
As we know, self-love is a practice that can be cultivated through the act of journaling.
Journaling provides you with an opportunity to play, explore and get to know your true self more intimately. It is a powerful tool that engages all aspects of our being: the left brain (logic and reasoning) and the right brain (intuition and creativity).
All you have to do is let go of any expectations about what you think journaling is supposed to look like. Just as it is with any spiritual practice, there is no one way or right way, just your way.
So I invite you to show up for yourself with compassion and kindness and just let words bloom. There’s no better place to start than where you are right now.
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